My boyfriend is a bit patriarchal.
So he has a perception that men make the money and women do the housework.
We're dating with marriage as our end-goal, so he told me, "later, I'm going to pay for your living expenses and you're going to do the housework".
I said okay because I'm working at a small company right now and I don't think that having a full-time job is too bad.
But if we're already together and he doesn't lift a finger and asks me to cook, bring him water, and run the vacuum cleaner, and if he doesn't like the way it's done, he would nag me a lot about it...
I would understand if we were married and I was getting money for living expenses, but now, it doesn't make sense because I earn my own money and don't receive any monetary support.
But my boyfriend does all the driving and hard work outside... and he makes good money from his business.
If we get married and that he works full-time, will I have to submit to him and live this way?... He's usually very sweet and he does spend more on dates than I do.
But I'm hesitant about this marriage and wonder if it's right to keep on seeing him.
post response:
[+220][-404]
original post: here
1. [+327, -3]
When you're dating, you're being treated the best that you can ever get. Once you get married, he won't be treating you better or worse than what's he's doing now.
2. [+239, -2]
Whether he's patriarchal or not doesn't mean that you should be his housekeeper for free?
3. [+214, -3]
Do you get paid a million won per month? So just because he's patriarchal, you'll have to fetch him water, give birth to your child and raise them alone, pretend to be joyful at your in-laws and also answer all his s*x*al desires?ã…‹ã…‹ wow ã…‹ã…‹ã…‹ Even a million won per month wouldn't be enough.... So you want to live this kind of life?... seeing how you're doing this even before marriage, he probably thinks that you're a fool... Women in their right minds would've already ran away. This is something he should be hiding ã…‹ã…‹
4. [+124, -3]
If you want to be a housekeeper next to a man who makes a lot of money, and you want to make a good living and please your boss, you should do it. But if you don't want this kind of life, then don't do it
5. [+118, -3]
What did he say? That he would pay you for doing the housework no? He doesn't even have a full-time job. You guys have no money, no kids, no full-time job, no support and it's a total dead-end... if you did the housework and that he had a full-time job, I'd understand but do you think that it's normal that you do all of this for him because of his single command? Hasn't he been gaslighting you for too long?
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